Thursday, September 22, 2016

Fake It "Til You Make It!!

I was doing some philosophical thinking today. I have been working with the boys on acting more grown up, doing things like a grown up should do and being more confidant in everything.
I have told them, “Fake it ‘til you make it.” Meaning when you have to do something you don’t want to, instead of being grumpy and letting everyone know your unhappy, fake a smile and pretend you’re enjoying yourself until you find you really are enjoying yourself. I don’t allow lying, but everyone needs to know how to put on a smile and just do what needs to be done.
So that got me thinking about people who grumble about everything. Tell me, what kind of person would you rather hang out with, #1: A person that treats life’s tough times as the end of the world? Or #2: A person who treats troubles as just a bump in the road that causes a course correction. I like to think that everything happens for a reason and that there are lessons to be learned. My life is not planned out by me, it is an adventure that I am on and learning new things at every turn. When something happens, it’s for a reason. It’s time for a course correction and keep moving on the journey.

Back to bad attitudes, think of a person you don’t like to spend much time with or that complains a lot. Now, think of something nice about that person, or anything good. It’s hard to think about the good things, right? All your brain can think about is the whining voice, complaining or crying. Is that the kind of person you are sharing with the world? Is that what you want to be remembered as? If not, “Fake it ‘till you make it!”

I saw a video on Facebook the other day, a mom talking about how she doesn’t care if she’s not her children’s best friend. She didn’t care that they were mad at her, because she didn’t want to be their friend, she wanted to be their mom. I have always said that too. But my kids do like me, they want to spend time with me, sit by me, even when they have a chance to spend time with other kids. Does that mean I am too soft on them? Not if you know my boys! I have always follow a belief that kids know that if you are willing to “SAVE” them from themselves, that means that you will save them from the hurt of the world. That means that it’s my job to correct their behavior and actions how I see fit. So while I have been saving them, they have learned to trust me. With that trust comes love and respect. That in turn makes them want to spend time with me. Other kids, adults and teenagers are unpredictable compared to me. I always tell my boys the truth, even “Yes, a shot will hurt.” And made them be accountable for their actions.

So now, how do I teach them confidence? It’s hard for a young teenager to be confident in the world today. They hear so much going on in the world and yet they don’t understand it all. It’s hard for an adult to be confident too! I guess some of confidence is “faking it!” I am just as nervous as the next guy. I wonder if I look alright for certain events or if I will meet anyone new. I question myself after an event and wonder if I could have done or said something different. I am sure that I am not the only one! But how do you teach that…... I am trying to by sharing like I just did, showing them by example.

 I know, it’s funny how I can go on from 1 little starting point…... but I did warn you all that I was doing some philosophical thinking today!